THE POWER OF Words & redirection of feelings
When you don't have time to spend with each other and the communication link is weak, something bad is bound to happen. There is bound to be a redirection of feelings. The light that was once bright and strong becomes dim and weak. You gradually don't feel the urge to see them again or have anything to do with them anymore.
Yes, love is very vital in a relationship but your presence is much better and more effective. You may not love someone so much at first but as you see the person more often and get talking, you will realize that you will start developing feelings for that person. When you are far apart, there is a 97% chance that your partner's feelings will no longer flow towards you. And if it does, it won’t be as strong as it ought to. Men are quick to redirect their feelings away from their women when they are far away from them. But women are very unpredictable on this. A woman’s unpredictability can never be predicted. Let me explain.
When you are in a long distance relationship, there are certain rooms you open up to outsiders that would not have been opened on normal circumstances. A man is easily moved by what he sees per time. A man will still be in love with a woman that is far away but will redirect his emotions towards the person he sees frequently. Mostly because of her curves and physical appearance. A man's emotions are not built to stand for long. But women survive on it. And emotions and feelings don't just pop up for women, they are built over time with just one powerful tool: Words.
Words are like seeds. And the most powerful place to plant them is in a woman's heart. Women need to be talked to all the time. They need to be reminded of the same thing almost every time. That you love them, they are the best and they still top the chart. Not because they forget but because it is in their nature. The reassurance (and actions too) are their emotional sustainability pills that their man MUST give them. Or else they break down.
No matter how powerful you think you love her or she loves you, when you're in a long distant relationship and you're not present to say stuff you're supposed to say to her, she will open the door to listen to another person. And note this, no matter how 'unqualified' that person is, if he has even 40% of words, you can and will loose your woman to him. It will only take time. And since you're far apart, he has that advantage. Don't ever think that she will remain faithful to you after listening to words that make her melt inside. Not for long. She can stand and maybe pretend for a while but as the seed begin to mature, she'll see you as a 'wrong choice'. This is what happens when you're in a long distant relationship.
And for the ladies, there are tendencies that a guy will redirect his feelings towards another girl when you're in a long distant relationship. The eye is the quickest way to a man's heart. But the ear is the fastest and the most effective way to get to a woman's heart. Why do you think women easily fall for players? Simple. They have one secret weapon: Words. Don't be surprised that when you're in a long distant relationship, your lady falls for a known player. Is it that she doesn't know he is one? Wrong bro, she does. And don't be taken aback when he falls for a girl that is less beautiful or less educated than you. It was the eyes. The more he saw, the more important she became. My point? Why allow such things happen when you can avoid them before the even take place? Avoid staying apart as much as possible.
Let me tell you a little true life story. I had a wedding to attend with a friend of mine one Saturday. After dressing up, she came out of the house and she was really looking very beautiful. In my usual way I said 'Wow! You look beautiful. You're earrings really do bring out the spark in your eyes. I'm going to go everywhere with you so no one steals you away from me'. The response I got that day was priceless. She lighted up so bright that it affected me too. I was smiling too.
'Really?'
'Sure'.
'You don't mean that. You're just flattering me'
'Believe me girl, you look gorgeous and any man that doesn't agree with that should have his head checked'
And then she shone even brighter. But all of a sudden she became so blue that I became confused for a while. When I asked why she was like that, she said 'my ex wasn't one who made good use of his words. He never complimented me. Anytime I dressed up and asked him how I looked, he would say nothing. And if he said something, his usual sentence was always 'You are ok'. And to make matters worse, we lived in different cities. That was one major reason why we had to break up'. That was when it hit me, and I rediscovered the power of words. It is so powerful that it redirects feelings faster than lightning.
So there you have it. Your relationship CAN NEVER be the same when you're in different cities or very far away. Don't get me wrong. There is a probability that it might just work out fine but the chances are slim.
Self-discipline and focus can help you go a long way. But the ugly truth be told. We all have limits. Don't wait until you break before taking necessary measures. Your relationship can work when you're far apart. But it stands a better chance when you're physically with the one you love.
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